focus on: focus on the family.

so, today is valentine’s day. despite the prevalence of chocolate/flowers/candy, the mood of love, and the seemingly unflappable skill of advertisers to make us wallow in our own self-despair and loneliness, it can be an appalling, infuriating, and demoralizing day for a lot of people. (though not, incidentally, for the walgreen’s cashier who insisted on wishing me a happy valentine’s day. weirdest “you too!” ever.)

but what i think isn’t important. i’d rather look, instead, at the thoughts of focus on the family’s denise morris, a contributor to the site’s boundless line blog. her thoughts include this idea on how to turn that valentine’s day frown upside down and into a biblical smile:

“Honestly, I understand the dislike for the day of love. When you’re single, it’s just a reminder that you have no one to get you flowers, and when you’re in a relationship, there’s pressure to get a good gift and meet romantic expectations.

However, February 14 — whether single, dating or married — can be fun. Last year, my roommate and I hosted a Valentine’s Day party for some of our girl friends. We made a nice dinner and decorated our apartment with red and white. We got everyone small gifts and watched a chick flick. Most importantly, we posted Bible verses around the apartment — reminding all the girls of the agape love God had for them. It might seem a bit corny, but it turned out to be a fun night.”

hooray for optimism and god’s love! it’s so “agape!” but i have other observations.

1. it is corny. but not just a “bit.”

2. are you comparing god’s giant, gaping love to the love of a (presumably male) lover? because isn’t that—i don’t know—blasphemous?

3. i can’t speak for everyone, but no one believes you hung bible verses around your apartment.

4. which “chick flick” did you watch? seriously. this is the most compelling possible detail you could’ve included to make you seem like a real person, and you left it out. did the movie have sexual themes? which ones? did you cry when mandy moore didn’t get that thing she wanted?

5. are you gonna meet god’s romantic expectations?

what’s on clearance at walmart.com?

Item: Laptop Cart, Maple

Was: $36.86

Clearance price: $31.87

Features and specs:

Designed with versatility in mind, this laptop cart features a locking storage compartment, adjustable height and a tilting work surface. The dual-wheel castors help the cart glide easily, so you can effortlessly push the cart anywhere. It offers a moveable desk area, so that you can get the most out of your portable computer.

• Locking storage compartment
• Rolls easily
• Adjustable height
• Tilting work surface
• Maple finish

Why you need it: Lacking a lap, desk, shelf, counter, or pile of corpses, where the fuck else will you put your laptop? Furthermore, this handsome stand (which looks like a backless rolling chair but just isn’t, ok?) has wheels to make your otherwise sedentary computer somehow…portable. Are you listening, Silicon Valley?

möchten sie meinen strauch, unartige deutsche sehen?

in a world still reeling from the loss of its candle in the wind (v. 3.0), thank you, sharon stone, for amping up the public, blonde crazy.

(sic): a closer look at random myspace profiles.

a new series wherein myspace pages are viewed, evaluated, copied, pasted, and jovially mocked.

Name: Dark Angel *Heartbreak Hotel*
Age: 25 years old
Location: Meriden, Connecticut
General: “line dancing, hiking, driving go-carts, hanging out with those who mean the most to me.”
Homepage Pimposity: 2/5
The background image of a killer whale in mid-jump reminds me of my whaling youth.
Friend count: N/A
Song playing: “Stand,” Rascal Flatts
Children: someday
Animated gif/jpeg tally: more than 25
Date viewed: 2/13/07